Just a quick post; I am working on a facebook group for me to better help others. So if you are on facebook please look up the group and let me know what you think! Thanks. https://www.facebook.com/groups/335116573314607.
”Nobody has a perfect life. Everybody has their own problems. Some people just know how to deal with it in a better way.”
Life is not perfect but it is mostly about how you look at it that could help you get through some of the hardest days! The way you view life can help you get through anything. Think about what you have and anthers are fighting to get their next meal,. There are many things that we can be thankful for each day even if the day is hard!
My research team and I just completed a study to examine the differences in how happy people live their lives compared to people who are unhappy. Because we were interested in several characteristics of happy people, including the relationship between money and happiness, we examined the predictors of happiness from 30 different surveys. These surveys measured people’s spending habits, consumer choices, values, and personality traits.
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The results indicated that happy people make 5 little decisions every day that improve their well-being. What are these 5 importance differences between happy and unhappy people, based on our recent consumer behavior studies?
Happy people think about the past fondly.
Perhaps unique among all animals, humans have the capacity to travel backward and forward in time—to use the “specious present” both to relive past life events and to think about the future. Our data shows that happy people appear to relive the ecstasy, but ignoring the agony, of days gone by. When happy people think about their past they focus on their good memories instead of dwelling on the negatives.
Happy people “catch” the emotions of others.
Some sensitive people are vulnerable to experiencing others’ emotions—they can “catch” them during joyful (and sorrowful) experiences. Our data shows that when someone smiles warmly at happy people, they smile back and feel warm inside. Therefore, if you pay more attention to the positive emotions of other people, you should become be happier.
Happy people live in a great community.
A person is happiest when three basic psychological needs are satisfied: autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Literally thousands of studies demonstrate the positive effect of psychological need satisfaction on happiness. Our data shows that these psychological needs can be met by one’s community. Happy people say that they feel belongingness where they live and that they look forward to coming home when they have been away.
Happy people manage their money well.
Something that any of us can do every day is to make a budget and track our financial transactions so we don’t make impulsive purchases. Research suggests that individuals will manage their money better when they have a clear goal—for example, paying off a credit card, saving for a comfortable retirement, or starting an emergency fund. Our data shows that if you manage your money better today, you will be happier tomorrow.
Happy people spend their money on life experiences instead of material items.
Almost 10 years of research has investigated the effects of investing money in life experiences, as opposed to material items. There is now robust evidence that when people spend their money on life experiences they are happier than when they spend on material goods. However, our data further shows that people who habitually spend their money on life experiences are happier than people who tend to buy material items.
Time charges everything, no-matter if it’s good or hard to deal with . But if you have love things does not seem as bad it is what helps the hard times easier to handle. We all have those times where nothing seems to go right; for some of us it’s easier than others. That doesn’t mean everyone of us needs to have someone who can give us love and comfort when we need it the most.
There’s been a lot of dialogue surrounding depression — particularly in light of recent events — as people struggle to understand why and how it affects people in the ways that it does. And for the 350 million people worldwide who do struggle with the condition, it can be just as hard to articulate its effects as it is to understand it.
Depression can make people feel like their minds have completely rebelled against them. From a lack of will to physical pain, it can cause people to function poorly at work, in school and in social activities, according to the World Health Organization. Many people who experience depression can also experience symptoms of anxiety.
But those factors are just the start. Below, find nine things people with depression know to be true (and what others can do to help alleviate them).
The frustration that comes when someone suggests you can “snap out of it.”
suck it up
The hard truth is, depression is not the sort of thing you can just wake up and be over one morning — and suggesting such may be sending an unsupportive message. According to John F. Greden, M.D., the executive director of the University of Michigan Comprehensive Depression Center, these phrases often stem from a lack of understanding of mental illness.
“When [loved ones] don’t understand what’s happening, their responses are ‘suck it up’ and ‘stop feeling sorry for yourself,'” Greden tells The Huffington Post. “It’s not understood that these are underlying illnesses and chemical abnormalities, so what they’ll do is use these phrases. … These comments are probably one of the worst irritations.”
People constantly confusing depression with sadness.
It’s a common misconception that depression is just a result of being overly sad. But as David Kaplan, Ph.D., chief professional officer of the American Counseling Association, stresses, the two are not one and the same.
“People throw around the word ‘depressed’ a lot,” Kaplan previously told HuffPost Healthy Living. “Depression is a clinical term — and a lot of times when people say they’re depressed, they really mean sad. The words that we use are very powerful and it’s important to make that distinction.”
There is no such thing as a little victory.
For those who deal with chronic depression, there are no little victories because every accomplishment is a big victory.
While everyday, routine motions come naturally to most people, for someone who is depressed, they are much harder feats, explains Jonathan Rottenberg, Ph.D., an associate professor of psychology at the University of South Florida. “Why do depressed people lie in bed? It isn’t because of great snuggle time under the blankets. It’s because depressed people can’t bring themselves to get out of bed,” he wrote in a Psychology Today blog. “Almost any activity or task becomes a painful ordeal, even things as simple as taking a shower or getting dressed.”
Lack of energy means more than your run-of-the-mill afternoon slump.
That 3 p.m. slump you feel when you need your third cup of coffee hardly compares to the drop in energy that occurs when you’re in a depressed state. Because of this lack of motivation, depression can sometimes make you feel like your muscles don’t work, Greden explains. “It makes it really difficult to go to work, to concentrate, to laugh, to keep your focus on assignments, when you’re hurting in this way,” he says.
There are physical symptoms — and they’re just as taxing as the emotional ones.
“At one point, everyone considered depression to be a mood state, and that’s a huge misconception,” Greden says. “Depression, for most people, actually involves major physical symptoms. And as a result, people don’t consider themselves depressed and they think something else is wrong.”
When someone experiences depression, physical ailments you already have can be made worse, Greden explains. Other physical symptoms include restlessness, indigestion, nausea, headaches, and joint and muscle fatigue. “These physical symptoms as well as the mood symptoms affect their routine life patterns,” he notes. “They’re all tied together.”
Things that used to be fun aren’t quite as enjoyable.
Depression can impact even the smallest pleasures in life. Hanging out with friends, fun activities like golfing and even intimacy with romantic partners all seem less exciting than they were before, Greden says. “Depression makes your life dramatically different.”
This lack of interest, coupled with the physical symptoms, are all major red flags when it comes to identifying the condition. To help someone who may be experiencing this downturn, Greden suggests approaching him or her with an open mind and continuous support, which includes offering to help find treatment.
The difficulty that comes with communicating your emotions.
When you’re experiencing depression, it can be challenging to put into words what’s going on in your mind when you know that not everyone around you feels the same way — especially when there’s a stigma around your illness. Only 25 percent of adults who experience mental health issues feel that people are sympathetic toward people struggling with mental illness, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
“Depression is a negative view of self, of the world and of the future,” Greden explains. “Everything is sort of being seen through dark-colored glasses. … It’s pretty common, when people are depressed, for them to think that no one understands them — and that’s a really tough place to be.”
The disorder is not one-size-fits-all.
Each person experiences depression in his or her own way — and because of this, experts recommend practicing empathy with loved ones who may be struggling. “Symptoms differ, causes differ, treatments differ,” Greden explains. “Jobs, relationships, families — everything gets changed by this illness.”
As HuffPost blogger Hannah Sentenac explains in a piece on life lessons she learned from depression, everyone’s journey is different: “For some people, medication is crucial. For others, long term psychotherapy might be the answer,” she wrote. “Whatever works. I’m not suggesting that my path is best for anyone but me. But I am suggesting that everyone has a path to healing — and the most important thing is to keep after it. Don’t give up.”
There are ways to help others break through the throes of depression, Greden says. That includes shedding any thoughts that could be perpetuating a stigma about mental health. “We need so much more openness, transparency and understanding that it’s OK to talk about depression as an illness,” he explains. “It’s not a weakness. It’s not a moral shortcoming. It’s not something people brought on themselves. And understanding that is a pretty powerful beginning to helping a loved one with depression.”
Have a story about depression that you’d like to share? Email firstname.lastname@example.org, or give us a call at (860) 348-3376, and you can record your story in your own words. Please be sure to include your name and phone number.
Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.
Life is meant to be shared with those you love.
, ”I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings. My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love.
If you own and accept who you are, even if it’s a different version than yesterday, other people will accept you too. -Kate Northrup
”“Disability is not a brave struggle or ‘courage in the face of adversity.’ Disability is an art. It’s an ingenious way to live.”
– Neil Marcus’
Most of us are actually pretty bad at predicting our behaviors and thoughts because the problem with tomorrow is that it hasn’t happened yet. In addition, numerous experiments show that people tend to believe that their best and most idealized selves will show up when the going gets tough. I’ve mentioned this study in another post but it’s worth repeating because it’s a dynamite example. Psychologists Julia Woodzicka and Marianne LaFrance asked women ages 18-21 to predict how they would react if they found themselves being harassed by a very intrusive and rude male interviewer in his early thirties. Most of the participants were sure that they’d be proactive and take charge—telling the guy off or even walking out. But when the researchers had the same women take part in what they believed was an actual interview for a lab position under the same circumstances that had been described theoretically, they acted very differently than they’d anticipated. They were much, much meeker and accepting.
I have Cerebral palsy; ”Cerebral palsy is a term which encompasses a set of neurological conditions that cause physical disability in human development – they affect the brain and nervous system. The word cerebral refers to the area in the brain that is affected, while palsy means complete or partial muscle paralysis, frequently accompanied by loss of sensation and uncontrollable body movements or tremors. Cerebral means related to the brain or cerebrum. Cerebrum is a Latin word meaning “brain; top of the head, skull”. In the English language the cerebrum is the anterior (front) portion of the brain consisting of two hemispheres; it is the dominant part of the brain in humans.” I don’t let CP control my life, I am a so called normal life. I have been through a lot in my life and to those times I have a life of my own, this is why I want to write to try to help others!
You can’t really begin to appreciate life until it has knocked you down a few times. You can’t really begin to appreciate love until your heart has been broken. And you can’t really begin to appreciate happiness until you’ve known sadness. Once you’ve walked through the valley, the view at the mountaintop is breathtaking. ~Susan Gale.
In my life there are so many people who have made an impact in my life. This one person who I have been so lucky to get to call her my special friend Knowing her; when she reads this she is going to get me for this but I wanted to do something special for her. She is the kind of person that will be there by my side for anything if she could; you know when you meet someone and you just know that you are meant to be friends! I don’t know how or how we got to be so close friends but I know this I’m never letting her go! She gave me this book named “footprints”, after we heard a song called “footprints in the sand”. On days I’m down or just when I need to get my mind off things I read it. The footprints poem is one of my favorites.. Here it is; “One night I dreamed a dream. I was walking along the beach with my Lord. Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonging to me and one to my Lord. When the last scene of my life shot before me I looked back at the footprints in the sand and to my surprise I notices that many times along the path of my life there was only one set of footprints. I realized that this was at the lowest and saddest times of my life. This always bothered me and I questioned the Lord about my dilemma. ‘Lord, you told me when I decided to follow You. You would walk and talk with me all the way. But I’m aware that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I just don’t understand why, when I needed You most You leave me’ He whispered ‘my precious child, I love you and will never leave you never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you’.”
Some days can be hard
what do you when life does not go as you had hoped?
Do you know who to talk to when life is not going your way?
You can also write out your feelings
Don’t keep them in.
Hope is knowing that you are not alone
You have the support that you need.
I would like to tell you my story. At six months old I was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy. The doctor informed my parents about a special “home” that could take care of me. I probably would never recognize anybody, talk or even hold my head… they were to concentrate on my two teenage brothers. But my family did not follow his advice. They worked with me, fussed over my simple achievements and encouraged me never to give up. My brothers showed me off with pride…Yes, there are many things that I will never be able to do. My speech is not always clear, my arms tend to have a mind of their own and yes, Life can be hard but if you give it your best you will be surprised with what you may achieve. Everybody is different! Even people without disabilities can’t do everything. So, I look for what I am good at and make the best of it.I guess it is easier to just use the disability as an excuse and not to try to achieve. But that is not how to LIVE LIFE, that is to just exist. I don’t expect to be treated differently. Actually I DON’T WANT to be treated differently. I had to fight for the right to be allowed to attend regular classes. Why? I do not think with my legs! But when I went on stage to get my “real” high school diploma all those months of struggle became history.Even though I have a disability it often makes it hard to do things on my own my friends and family help me understand that I can do anything I set my mind to, including my faith . My faith in god has always helped me realize that I am normal although I talk funny. When I have a day where my body tends to have a mind of its own moving fast I like to think of it as dance moves that come natural . People with disabilities deserve to be allowed to achieve their best like anybody else, whatever that might be. But… like everybody else they must earn rights and respect! Do not give up. Look for the rainbow after every storm! Make the best of your LIFE!
”Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing. -Mother Teresa”. I wish there were ways to help everyone that I meet; you can’t work through no-matter how much you think you have moved on. People grief differently, we need to have somebody to talk to. But I have learned that sometimes you just give someone a smile and the love will make help more than anything else.
”No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. -Aesop”
Kindness is important! Today we don’t think about this; to help someone who is in need; all you need to do is let them know that you are there for them whenever. And also that they are loved.
Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts?
Love can be hard sometimes, but most of the time
Love is one of thing that can get through the hardest times.
This life can get so busy
but let’s remember to always show loved ones;
how much they are loved!
Life is full of differences, everyone is created difficulty! Then why are we all afraid of differences. I have a disability which I didn’t care that I am different. I know it’s not always easy to be the one always left out because people don’t think we all have that in common; but if people could see that we are all different , it would make life so much easier if we don’t understand that being is amazing. So how can we all work together?
”Disability is the consequence of an impairment that may be physical, cognitive, mental, sensory, emotional, developmental, or some combination of these. A disability may be present from birth, or occur during a person’s lifetime.” You might be wondering how I can talk about these two very different topics in one blog. Well I think that depression is also a kind of disability; there are so many different kinds that we realized it sometimes. We all have some kind of disability; we need people around us who can support and love us the way we are. Life of today wants us to believe that being different is bad as if something is wrong with you. Have you ever thought about what being different means to you or maybe even to everyone ? Does it mean having a disability or that you think differently from your friends? Well here is what I think about disabilities if we are different from each other and having a disability means being disabled then doesn’t that mean we all have some kind of disability!
This weekend I was in Long Beach, California, for Ms. Wheelchair American 2015. It’s a comparison to get women in wheelchairs to that do amazing things even though other people may think that just because people use wheelchairs that they can not have a normal life; they are in chairs does not mean that they can’t have a great life, Well it was more for other people that don’t see a disability as normal. This comparison is not about how they look it’s more about what they do. Imagine you were able to walk and do everything in your daily life without needing help. Having the doctor says that you can’t walk again for some of the woman, that is what they went through that; but now they did the Ms. Wheelchair pageant. It was my second time to be apart of this amazing event; the first time I went as Ms. Wheelchair Colorado 2010. Let me just say that week was the best week, to have a week where they are people who going through the same things as you felt awesome. I learned so much about myself too. Now I am the coordinator for Ms. Wheelchair Colorado; this organization is so amazing. I know I’m a depression writer; now I am going to be writing about both topics, they do both need are important to me.
Love in never changing
Love is everything
Love is sadness
Love is happiest
Love is always around you
Love might not always be felt,
But it’s everywhere we go!
”’Throughout life you will meet one person who is unlike any other. You could talk to this person for hours and never get bored. You could tell them anything and they would never judge you. This person is your soul mate, your best friend. Don’t ever let them go.”
”Love is never lost. If not reciprocated it will flow back and soften and purify the heart. -Washington Irving”
This is so true love is not something that you can ever lose no-matter if someone moves away! Everything can change but love is the one thing that never changes!